Not a happy bunny!

You know what i like to do right now? Self-train myself the art of yoga, then turn the oven to 350 and climb inside until well done. I'm suicidally unBLOGable and its disastrous.

I Could Never Be Your Woman

It was ages ago since i last sat down at home, alone, with the lights off, enjoying a good movie over a cuppa of hot milo. Ahh. The good old days. How i miss them! Hmm. Nowadays, i only make do with short intervals between tea break and waiting for my ride home, to steal a glance off the telly to see what's brewing in movie land.

That evening, 'i could never be your woman' was the best there were to offer on hbo. And who would have thought, after all these years since clueless, paul rudd could still rob me with his dreamy puppy dog eyes, that perfect set of pearly whites, those tousle hair and that oh so macho dance moves. Aww. Where is the white puffy clouds and wings cause i just went to heaven...hihi

Even though the movie didn't make it to the theater and was release straight to dvd, it was somehow quite an entertaining movie to catch. Written and directed by amy heckerling, 'i could never be your woman' is a sweet little tale about falling in love with someone 'unreachable' and sticking together in the fight against the logic of mother nature. It doesn't help that michelle pfeiffer still oozes that irresistible charisma, making this whole film simply entertaining.

Oh well, back to work now...

Much needed holiday!

Koh Samui | 28th December '07 till 2nd January '08

Sick till high heaven!

I'm sick and about to die. Ohkay, maybe i'm being a bit dramatic and dying is not in the agenda yet. But laying here on the couch with oprah blasting thru the telly and a handful of diamond shaped medicines, i can't help but think this is like the worst time to get sick ever. I mean, its the weekend after all and b52s' are calling me in an evil way to head to the nearest bar for a drink. But i cannot go obviously because i'm sick. Like duh!. And christmas is just round the corner, and i've actually planned on going to the mall for a bit, to stock up on the gifts, but i can't now because i don't seems to be able to feel my toe anymore and i'll probably freeze to death upon stepping into a mall. And most importantly, i've got a shoot that i've been prepping for a month now on tuesday and there's just so much more stuff to do, i can't afford to fall sick. Not now. Bummer!

I know i'm sad and pathetic and you need not remind me about it already, but like it or not, subconsciously working has become a part of my life. A big part. Its what i enjoy most, its my hobby and i believe that we should love what we do coz only then, you'll be be able to get the best out of it. Besides, it funds the other interest in my life, namely the shopping sprees, the endless drinking session and the killer of all, the holiday trips Ohh! Did i mentioned i'm going to koh samui for the new year?! Yippee. My first backpacking trip (sort of) to thailand with the girls. And its surefire gonna be a blast. I can just feel it.

So, my only mission in life now is to effing get well before the weekend ends and let the love muffins say amen! Ohh god, i'm already hallucinating. Need to sleep. Need to sleeepppp........

Melanie Bridge's very best. Whois she? Google la...

L O S T

Going thru some major blogger's block. Not sure why. But hopefully i'll be back soon. Anyway, i designed a flyer for a friend's gig this coming christmas and i thought i should post it up here. What do you think?

Ten Self-Promotional Facts about Mr Wanna

Ohh...this is an ancient photo. Taken way back when i thought aphrodisiac is a type of dessert. Silly me!

Thought i should share a bit more about myself to all ya perverts out there. But don't worry, i wouldn't reveal too much of it cause i'm sure to scare off the only few readers i have. I seriously think i have like the least traffic happening on my blog in blogger's history ever. One look at my cq counter and you'll slowly realize the painful truth that i'm my very own biggest fan contributing more reads than any other visitor! Tragic sungguh! Anyhow, here's Ten Self-Promotional Facts about Mr Wanna...

#01: I have ulcer (oral) every other week
Yup, its true and i'm probably the only one who suffers from it. I mean who gets so many ulcer in a month? Pathetic. So, if i ever go out on a date with you and i'm being awfully quiet the whole time, it doesn't mean that i don't like you. It's probably because i have a mouth full of ulcer and can't talk without bleeding myself to death.

#02: I scold people once a year
I didn't realized this until a friend point out to me awhile back. I don't scold or get mad easily. I think i'm just emotionless and couldn't care less to bother having a screaming match with anyone. Ohkay, maybe i'm also quite a nice fella in general.

#03: I like bald bad boys with belly (the four b's)
Ohkay, not really in that order but i do have the weirdest taste in men. I like bad boys. And guys who have a shaven head. And also someone who's slightly heavy. But most importantly, he must at least be a moderate looker la. Let's be real, i won't go dating a bald, fat, ugly gangster just because he has the four b's! Ohh please!

#04: I'm single with commitment issues
Enough said.

#05: I thought i had my appendix removed when i was four
Haha. I have always thought for the longest time that i had my appendix removed when i was four. You see, i have a small scar somewhere in the tummy region, but no one tells me that appendix is on the right till discoball pixie had her's removed. And mine was on the left. Don't blame me, i failed biology in high school!

#06: I'm a cheeky straight guy when i'm drunk
Ohh, i'm a renowned cheeky bastard who rides up a girls skirt when i'm drunk. I'll be dirty dancing with random girls on the dance floor and even once almost(!) made out with a friend's friend. But thankful she knows i'm gayer than elton john and just as harmless.

#07: I'm a perfectionist who doesn't watch tv series
Unfortunately this is true. I can't bear to follow a tv series religiously if i know i'll be missing certain episodes. And me being a workaholic, i'm sure to miss out all the reruns even if they aired it three hundred times a day! Hence, i don't watch tv series unless i buy box sets of its entire season ever produced. But i'll be broke by then. So no tv series for me.

#08: I have only dated one guy and half a girl
Everyone knows i have a mr ex boyfriend, so no biggie there. But i actually almost dated a girl when i was in college! She's was a good friend in college, and things got a bit out of control and we actually went on a date. But it didn't work out eventually. She's not my friend now. I think she still hates me...

#09: I get really nervous when people looks at me doing things
Be it at work or play, i get all sweaty and panicky when i know someone is watching me. I really don't know why. And the worst thing is, my brain would decide to shut down and stop functioning, leaving me making a total fool of myself.
Just to let you know, on an average day i have four nervous breakdown generally. I need help. And i need it fast!

#10: I think i'm a homophobic gay
Logically i'm not sure if its ever possible to be a homophobic gay. Or if there's such a thing as being that. But as of late, that's how i'm feeling and its weird. I can't explain it. Shit! I don't even know where to start. All i know is, i get slightly irritated or somehow annoyed easily, just being in the same room with another gay. I can't seems to tolerate gays and knowing that i'm gay myself makes it doubly confusing. No offense cause i know i might come off as a ditzy hypocrite but at least i'm being honest. I think i might even be turning straight. Eiks!




Honestly, what the heck is wrong with me?!!

Going | a w a y

I'm thinking of the beach. The sun. The sand. Those hot japanese surfers. And the boogie board. I so N E E D a holiday! Badly...

LAPSAP

Okay, lets be real, i ain't getting any younger than what i am already. Even if i burn my birth certificate and pretend that i'm still twenty two on every birthday, the lines after lines of crow feet and wrinkles is enough of a giveaway by itself. My nephew could easily write a whole five hundred words essay on my face and there would still be enough room to doodle in a few hearts. So i figure, before i turn into a prune and freak the living shit out of anyone, i might as well indulge in some serious ass jiggling, hips banging partying while i can. Which explains the two separate gigs i managed to score for the weekend. And lucky me, one of it is a lapsap party, and you know what they say about lapsap being the new wave!! Ohh, its so gonna be a messy weekend! Aww...

Empty Biscuit Can

You know how sometimes you're just simply uninspired to blog about anything, even though you have like a million and one thoughts fluffing in your head every second. And it gets really frustrating to rewrite and write the same sentence over and over again, because you just can't seems to get it right somehow. This is just so irritating. And to know that british glamour model jordan aka katie price can write a handful of books with an ounceful of brains makes it even more annoying. Forgive me if i'm sounding like a prune but she's a airhead with an empty biscuit can as brains and missile as boobs, so how is it that i'm the one having a blogger's block then? Or is there something missing here? Am i even more of a walking airhead than her? Could it be that underneath my exterior of sheer confident and intelligent lies a himbo is disguise? Am i channeling pete andre then? Oh, this is bad! And if this goes on any longer, i'll be better off at a bar drinking my life away. Shit! This is even worst than watching japanese game show on sunday afternoon. Argh!!!

Oh by the way, saw stardust the other night. It was a bomb. Go watch it. If its not for its stupendous special effect and witty storyline, than just freaking damn watch it for charlie cox as he's looking crazy hot and sporting some deliciously dangerous lips in the movie. He's a cutie patootie! And ya, claire danes and michelle something was in it too...

I.Am.Fat

It all started with me being fat. And you know how it is with overweight gay boys and the amount of stress he gets. I mean, how would i fit in my new size 0 body hugging dsquared fuschia pink shirt now? Bummer! But i wasn't worried a month back, i was giddily having the time of my life, eating my guts out till i finally tip the scale pass obesity. And it all went downhill from then on. The tummy started to bulged, the skinny jeans felt more like leggings, the sudden appearance of flappy underarms and that round face! All hope of becoming the next Adriana Lima shattered right before my eyes. And the most upsetting part is that, i so totally ate every single pound i put on, with no remorse, no looking back and no holds bar. And now, its all coming back to me. Haunting me day and night, whispering into my conscious telling me 'I am fat'.

So, the only logic thing to do is to go for a diet and maybe, exercise a bit. And me being totally against anything that involved sweat, i opt for the only best option, diet. I started off with a seven days detox plan that cuts out everything yummy and tasteful. Hence, no sugar, no salt, no meat, no rice, no bread, no coffee, no soft drinks, no alcohol and no nothing! It all went super smooth until the weekend comes and the girls lured me into the evil temptation of vino and curry crab supper at pelita's. And i was only at day two of my detox plan! Arghh!!

Then, seeing that the diet plan went down the drain, i had no choice but to exercise. I contemplated on joining the gym, but finally decided against it. Why? Well, i did joined twice previously, but never had i once step into a gym on both occasion. I was just too lazy. There was just too much decision on what to wear to the gym and the amount of toiletries i packed, was like lifting weight by itself. So batal project once again...

Just to let you know, i'm still fat, but at least i'm swimming daily and i pick up a routine of doing fifty crunches, twenty butt lift, twenty push up, twenty abs stretch and twenty second of Jessica Alba (dunno how to explain this, but its an exercise to tone the ass..hihi) daily, all in the comfort of my home. Ahh, the luxury of apartment life.

Ohh, if you're wondering who's the cutie pie in the blue shorts, well, its none other than yours truly, mr wanna. I was a fat baby then. And of course, i'm still fat now.

Emo Monday!

Emo. Emo. Oh, it was more emo-licious than i thought it could possibly be. I knew all along that i'm a sucker for super sad, overly dramatic sloppy chick flick. But this is something else. Think Mandy Moore's 'A Walk to Remember', times it by two, add on a dash of goosebumps and you'll get 'P.S. I Love you' The trailer is brilliant, and i can't wait to see it, even if it means sitting thru the entire movie looking at that thing called hilary swank. Seriously, i can't heck that girl!

the ugly submarine's Top Ten Must Have

How needy are you? Are there anything particular that you must have in order to get through a day? Like some certain cravings or specific must have gizmo? I personally knows a lot of people that can't get thru a single hour without smoking or drinking cup loads of coffee. Or lately, there are some friends that are totally addicted to facebook, thus making it their top priority in life above eating and breathing. Others craves for chocolates or anything sweet in times of pms-ing. But what about you? Are there anything that you must have? Like really must have?

I consider myself easy to live with as i'm quiet accommodating in a lot of ways. I simply hate a lot of things, per se. Say for instance, i don't like coffee, hate chocolates, despise sweets, don't understand crackers, loathe ice creams, totally dislike boardgames, hate anything that makes me sweat, a freak to everything hi-tech, and the list goes on and on. Hence, i'm not a very needy person. But there are certain things that i totally must have, or else i'll be grumpy like hell for the rest of the day. Here's my Top Ten List of Must Have...

To top the list, it would be my MacBook. Oh, this is a must! A definite must have. Its even more important than life itself. And i can't imagine going thru a single day without having my mac with me. Its gonna be like living without a limp.

No, that's not barney the purple pedophile. Its blue hyppo, the friendly internet provider. Without it, my life is doom as well. I'll be better off feeding the birds in the park and playing chess with the oldies.

The handphone. Not my current one though, which i must say is the stupidest and most complicated piece of metal ever created. If its not for the dual camera and video con features, i won't have bother hanging on to it for so long.

I'm a huge HUGE fan of doodling. I know its a bad habit but i can't help it. I doodle on everything and anything. Which explain the numerous notebook i have with me on all times. One never know when the doodle itch with come.

Moisturizer. Oh this is also a must have. Rough hands are so last season.

Shades. Its like the next best thing since wonder bra. Every sister adores a good shade. Be it the manly ray bans or those bigger than life sunglasses, shades are becoming the new girl's best friend. So move along diamonte!

Hair mud. How else would i maintain the mohawk look without it?

My daybed! Its the best for those day dreaming session. Zzzz.

I'm obsess with sneakers. Particularly red sneakers. I wear them on all occasion be it formal or casual. Can't live without them either.

And finally, an occasional b52 won't hurt! :-p

Another day at work...

The pass week have been like hell. I was busy like a motherf@#$er and a half, but it was somehow fulfilling in an uncanny way. Spoken like a true workaholic! Haha.

Anyhow, i had a fantabulous shoot the other day, as always. But this time it was slightly more interesting. Its been awhile since i had any shoot that involved rain rig, so you should have seen the look of admiration on my fat face when the 'artificial' rain was up and pouring. I was in awe. Goosebumps and weak at the knees. I had a moment that morning. Hard to explain. Its one of those thing where you need to be there to feel it. :P

Anyway, the shoot was a lovey dovey tale between an author and her reader, and a lost charm bracelet, all thrown in together with the raining scene and melodramatic slow-mo action, making it a super jiwang tv commercial for all you peeps out there. It was like 'chor luin' (first love) all over again! Hihi. And ohh, i designed the book cover in the book launch scene where the author finally come face to face with her 'reader' The pink one was chosen out of the lot, and it was printed into books, banners and posters for the shoot. I was a proud daddy that day. Hence, i was going all out, snapping away at my little artwork. You like?

My girlfriend and i had a thought, something that's totally not related to any of this. Can someone be a homophobic gay? Is it even possible? Will explain later.

What i do when i'm bored out of my mind...

Time for a little camwhoring action!

The Masquerade Party

Halloween. I was shocked. Speechless. And slightly dazed. Never have i ever thought it could be blown so out of norm, so elton john-ish, big and glittery but i'm thankful it did. It was an all night affair that stirred quite a lot of stares from the club goers around us, which i'm betting my best penny, that they must be thinking what lunatics we are. Haha. I don't blame them. We were quite an odd dressing lot, with torn panty hose, lace top, feathers and tons and tons of hairspray, making it terribly easy to spot us from a mile away. And some of us didn't even bother wearing knickers underneath all those getups, but that's a WHOLE different story all together for another post, ahem...

Persatuan Gadis Malang Sedunia

Underage Trash

Kinky Dark Angel

Orgasmic French Maid

H a l l o w e e n

I'm shooting in five hours time. Need to sleep. Halloween was fun. Will explain later. xoxo

Am i lonely?

Someone dear to me asked me a few nights away, 'Am i lonely?' Well. I am. And it gets worst when i lay down on my bed every night cause it feels empty. Empty from inside, as though i've never felt loved. But i know i should be thankful. Thankful for being apart of a loving family, thankful for having friends that really cares and thankful for being here at this moment. But why is it that there's this hollow feeling stabbing right through my heart, scarring pass my conscious, and whispering eagerly to be love? To be love by someone i can call my own. To be given that special attention again. And to be able to know that nothing in the world matters when that special someone steps into the room. So i guess the answer is right, i am lonely.

And there are times when it gets so bad, when the feeling gets so overwhelming that i drown myself with work to get away from it all. And it works. Once. Twice. But how long am i going to lie to myself? How long can i stay pretending that everything is alright, and its all part of a bigger plan? Cause frankly, its not working for me. I still lay down on my bed every night, with that same empty feeling, echoing me to sleep. Without fail. Every night.

Everything ME

I'm bored, therefore i think i shall tag myself with another meme. Sad i know, but its okay. I stole this off from him, who owns a dainty little blog not far from mine. And while you're there, go look at his profile picture, i think he's quite cute. In fact, he looks almost like one of my fling, dhl guy. I wonder what he's doing now...

1. I've come to realise that my last kiss was sweeter than i remember. Enough said.

2. I am listening to the growling sound of my stomach. I need food. And i need it now. Hungry la...

3. I talk to myself when i think no one is watching. I sometime even have conversations with myself. I'm just stupid. I know.

4. I love colouring the sky with my imaginary brush, while laying on the grass on a empty field. I do that a lot when i was younger, back home on the island. I miss those times.

5. My best friends are either alcoholic or with severe ocd tendency. I really need a new set of friends.

6. My car is with my ex-boyfriend. Don't ask. Won't tell. Can't explain.

7. My love life is too complicated to understand. But as far as i remember, i'm still single and loving every minute of it. Of course there are times that i wish there was someone else to share my laughters with, but this things are difficult and i've learn to live without it. I'll be happier that way.

8. I hate it when people ask for my identification card while trying to get into a club. Or while buying drinks at chili's for that matters. I'm twenty six, so leave me alone. Do i look like some underage slut trying to get drunk on a weekday? Oh, please...!

9. Love is not something to be taken for granted.

10. Marriage is lingering in my thoughts as of late. I think age is catching up and its about time i get hitch. Any takers?

11. Somewhere, someone is thinking what the heck is wrong with me and my obsession with everything pink.

12. I'm always thinking of taking the next flight out to some place far away, where i could be who i am and do what i like. No more expectation. No more being judge upon.

13. I have a secret cheesy crush on victoria beckham. I think her melons are just fantabulous!

14. My cell phone is stupid and permanently on shutting down mode.

15. When I wake up in the morning, i always remind myself why the heck do i even bother doing what i'm doing now. Then it all become clear to me. I need the money. Its the only motivation.

16. When I go to bed at night, i wish i have someone else to share the bed with, someone i could cuddle up to, other than my mr bean bear.

17. Right now I am thinking about going for a beer with the girls. But its only eleven in the morning. A tad too early for alcohol. I'll call them at noon.

18. Babies are, the cutest thing ever! Ask discoball pixie and she'll tell you ALL about them. Just make sure you have ear plugs. She's an obsessed godmother.

19. I get on MySpace, if only i have an account there. I'm too lazy to maintain anything other than this blog, hence i have no friendster, hiFive or myspace accounts.

20. Today I am at work. I know its a saturday, but i need to work up to my workaholic status. I have a reputation to keep, you know.

21. Tonight I will still be working while half of my friends would be partying their arse off at malacca.

22. Tomorrow I will also be working, because i have nothing better to do. Maybe i'll swing by to toys r' us to get some mask for halloween.

23. I really want to eat kentucky fried chicken. I've been off fast food for the past half a month and i can't take it no more! Diets and detox are no fun.

24. Someone that will most likely repost this is going to have an headache filling up this meme.

i think i'm so cute!

Proof!

Didn't i mentioned over and over again that i'm super duper famous? Here's me and my peeps glam-ing it up on the cover of our debut single, scheduled to release by end of the year. Move along greenday, coz NO'Sync is in the house yo!

Autograph anyone?

Are you Hamsap enough?

Have you ever have the feeling of being punched in the stomach, squashed into a corner, gagged and left suffocating alone? I'm not having a good day. In fact, i'm not having a good week. Will explain later.

Random Fact #02

Remember my little obsession with slightly heavier man, well, lets just say that wasn't the only hidden craving i have. I'm a sucker for straight guys or anyone that's the least gay in the room. Something about having extra testosterone is very comforting and nerve wrecking at the same time. And it would be an additional thrill if they're as fine as mr patrick wilson here. He just oozes sex appeal. Those chiseled jawline, washboard abs, those arms and that smile is enough to mess up my day, like totally! Which explains my new pre-new-year-resolution to lose all those baby fats (hihi) near the tummy, go for a detox plan and focus on all those crunches, push up and back stretch. And i'll probably have to strap on the abtronic more frequent than i'm allowed to. Its all for a better me. Besides, i'm heading off for a beach holiday end of the year, and i need to look super fine in my board shorts. How else would i get the guys, rite!

Eid Mubarak!

I never had so much lemang, chicken rendang, fish serunding and beef kurma in a day! Which i must say ain't helping much with my little plan of sliming down, losing the tummy and embark on a more healthy lifestyle. It all went down the drain during my last raya holiday, back at mr ex-boyfriend's hometown. And before you start asking me why the hack was i there, well, i dunno and i can't figure it out either. Its very complicated and confusing at times. Basically its just hard to back away from a six years relationship and totally cut off from each other. You see, i'm cooking buddies with his mum, gossip partner with his sisters and like a godson to his dad. And spending raya at their home is like a tradition. After all, his mum did gave me my own baju raya this year. How not to go back this year? How la..

I think brown is my colour la. It compliment my skin tone nicely. And from the look of mr ex-boyfriend, i think he certainly agrees! Hahaha..

This is mr ex-boyfriend's brother. Quite cute la. Studying to be a doctor. Can't wait to be on his examination table! Touch me doc mcdreamy, i think i'm sick! Aww..

Oblivion is the new bliss...

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Freedom Fighter

Was talking to a crew while on shoot today, and he somehow show me a part of our asian culture that i thought have lost in the mist of modernization. Two thing first, this is him...

And secondly, yes, i was having my usual single-day-crush on him. Hihi. He's cute la, but all so wrong for me. He's like way off younger than me, way off, thus i'll probably end up babysitting him more likely. But definitely a good eye candy on boring shoots like today. What could be interesting about shooting cloth's movement on a hundred and fifty frame per second in a warehouse studio on a sunday morning? What could possibly be interesting about it?

But anyway, back to him, i was utterly shock to hear that he was engaged, okay, maybe i was more heart broken to be honest. So the boy is taken. Big deal. There are more trees out there in the forest, so just because one is taken doesn't mean its any less for me right? But him being engaged to an arranged bride is jaw-breakingly shocking with a capital J. Argh!! Do people still do arranged marriage in this part of the world? I thought it only happens in paperback novels or movies? Okay, and also in the olden times, where pointy bustline and micro mini is a definite must have for the ladies. But seriously, arranged marriage?!! Aiyoo. What will i do if i was force into an arranged marriage? Think positive. Think positive. Think...

I got at least someone to blame if the marriage fails. My parents, for that matters. But i do like the ideal of getting to know someone only after marrying him and learn to love him for the rest of my life. It's likely to make me appreciate him more...

Irene having a moment...

I'm cute too!

How cool is this! I got myself a doll! All thanks to her!

I'm so proud of you!

'Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take pleasure in other peoples sins, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes' quoted from A Walk To Remember

s i n g a p o r e

I'm uninspired to write anything about singapore. Everyone have been there so many times and there are only so much you could say about it. Its after all singapore we're talking about here. So, enjoy the pictures. That's the best i could do for now. Au revoir.

I did a bryan boy in singapore! The aunties and uncles weren't very impressed...

Cam whoring to the best!

Rip Curl : Memoirs of an obsessed fan

Malaysian Unite!